"I believe a man does what he can...until his destiny is revealed to him".

A wise saying which came out of the film The Last Samurai. Honestly, it touched me deep considering the fact I'm involved with it. I'm practically chasing my destiny as well... I believe God brought me to Holland for a purpose and it's that very purpose the one I'm trying tu fullfil now.

As you may have read already, has this year had a great beginning and things have taken place in an impressive way. I'm now trying as hard as I can to reach my goals. It's no easy way. Every time it's asking more and more of me. This relentless passion of mine thrives me into the sea of loneliness which I fear the most. Every time I make a turn to follow this path, do I have to leave safe ground therefore entering new regions involving new faces and sorroundings along with it. At this moment I feel I'm surrounded by those who appreciate me, love me, and even admire me. However, it's solely me in my room sitting behind the PC writing this lament of mine. Most of them whom I love are out of humane reach. They're not palpable but rather digital words with sentimental meanings behind the electronics of a screen. It's painful because that particular human warmth cannot be transmitted through the radiation of such screens. I miss it... I need it... I long for it...

...the destiny of a man...it can be relative though imperative as well. It can be imperative if you choose to give your all for a certain purpose. Well, how can you deny the imperativeness of a decision when you know that it's for your own best? I've chosen for God's will for me. What can be better than that? It ain't easy as you may realise. Though following Him is no easy task, He grant me a whole new life and a whole new start towards awesome dreams! The most beautiful of it all, is the fact that His will is real. I'm living it and experiencing every moment I live. Otherwise, there would be nothing such as the job I have now, the fact that I can study and sport here, the fact that all doors are open to follow my dreams and make them come true?! So this is my destiny so far, He's revealed his will (destiny?) to me and I'm ready to follow it. It may be lonesome at times, but He's always with me and I know and trust that one day, one unique and special day will I be able to see my loved ones face to face once again. Until then...

I trust you Lord for you know who I am, my pain, my longing and my needs. If you don't grant me something, I know it's not because you forgot me or fainted me but instead, because there's something greater awating for me. My trust and hope lie in You, Amen.